Laid Back Parent

I have never been one of those mums who needs routine.

I’ve never been a routiney type of person. Or organised. Ever.

I’m disorganised and a bit chaotic at times which can drive me (and everyone else) mad, but I can’t help it – it’s just who I am.

Don’t get me wrong. I get things done (eventually) and I manage to get everyone to where they need to be, (albeit in a rush) which is no mean feat when two of your children have an out of school activities schedule as long as your arm.

Sometimes I wish I was more efficient, more tidy and generally a lot more disciplined.

But I’m not.

I wish I could get things done all in one ‘sitting’ instead of being so easily distracted by anything and everything.

But I can’t.

I would say that I’m a pretty laid back kind of parent. I’m probably too relaxed about a lot of things and minor irritations don’t stress me out. I do feel as though I’m up to my eyeballs in it at times and wonder what others make of my slightly carefree attitude – but is it really such a bad thing?

I mean, I probably don’t get as wound up about certain things as other people do. My God, I have friends who are almost suicidal if their house is untidy – What the actual fuff is that all about?! I can leave mine until I’m good and ready, not a problem.

I can zone out quite easily too when my kids are going nuts which is a definite bonus when you have four of the little blighters to contend with, or TWINS!!!

I remember when I was expecting my twins, people used to say to me “Aren’t you worried?” or “How are you going to cope?” but honestly my true reaction was always to shrug and say “I’ll just get on with it” – I wasn’t worried about it for a single moment. Why would I? What’s the point? The twins were coming, I was immensely excited so why stress? (Slightly naive I have to admit but that’s a whole other story).

I have never had much family around to help with my children, my OH works long hours so it’s a godsend I suppose that I’m rather laid back. I need to be. I just can’t let things get to me. This can be difficult at times but I know that I’m in constant demand and I have so much to do that getting worked up wouldn’t be good for my mental state. I certainly don’t ‘expect’ anyone else to be running around, doing anything for me which is maybe why I have adopted my ‘I’ll just get on with it’ attitude!

Being laid back though doesn’t mean I’m not strict about certain things; I am. Like what my children watch on TV; soaps are banned as is anything that teaches my children things they shouldn’t know at a young age. I like us all to sit down to eat dinner together, with manners. I don’t like messing around at the dinner table. I’m very picky about how and where my children spend their time. For my teen, he is definitely only allowed out when I say so and with whom I’ve agreed. One can’t be complacent where this is concerned!!

I make sure my kids are polite and well mannered. But that’s about it.

I don’t get stressed if my kids go to bed late sometimes. I don’t mind if they eat lots of sweets and cake on occasion and don’t get their five a day – who’s counting anyway? As long as they have enough, are fit and healthy I’m not going to lose sleep. I don’t care if there are toys all over the place. And so what if they get dirty? They can change, clothes will wash – no big deal.

My lack of disorganisation is frustrating at times though. I could really do with having one of those life coaches or whatever they’re called, come round to put some order in my life! You know, sort out my house so that everything has it’s place, they could show me how to manage my time better – as long as they don’t give me lists. I hate lists!

To be honest though, I would rather shun practically anything for that all important cuddling up on the sofa time with my kids. Take today for example, I picked my twins up from school at lunchtime, we came home, had some lunch, played, then we watched tv snuggled up together. The house looked like a bomb site and yes it bothers me that I will have to do it at some point (or the OH will come home and give me that look that says ‘what the hell have you been doing all day?’) but it doesn’t bother me enough to get up and do it! And miss that quality time with my sons?

Absolutely no way.


  1. I think being laid back about stuff makes you more able to cope with twins or surplus amounts of children! It’s the very organised/routiney types who would massively stress out when things don’t go quite to plan.

    I think i am somewhere in the middle, i get a bit stressed about unimportant stuff and am not really able to relax when the house is a mess. I wish i was a bit more like you as i do think it sometimes makes me miss out of quality time with the littleies x

  2. Now, I’m an organised, list-liking kind of person! But, I think you’re absolutely right in saying that some things don’t matter, things aren’t worth stressing over (I’m organised, but I don’t stress too much either!) as as long as you and you family are happy and healthy, does it really matter? Lovely post x

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